everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
