I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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