I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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