I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
We're using joints as your birthday candles
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
