In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
The struggles of a small town man whore
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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