she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
