rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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