Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You are a genius and a whore.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
