This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
