I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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