i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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