So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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