I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So much rum. So many feels.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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