I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
