I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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