Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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