Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
