just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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