You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
