HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
a search helicopter?!
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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