Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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