Christians are straight up FREAKS
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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