She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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