It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
