You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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