i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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