I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
