i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
