at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
