What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
