he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
