youre lurking in front of me
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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