I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
