I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
