She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
