I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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