I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
