it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
Randomize