i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
