that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
