that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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