I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
