i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
