Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
this hospital has no fireball
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
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