So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
