my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Randomize
