If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
