Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
