wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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