she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
